You can't just write jokes. You need to say them.
Punchlines should be like a verbal slap in the face so avoid long words/phrases that land like feathers. Also: If your punchline’s got a hard -k sound in it, all the better.
One mistake aspiring writers-turned-comedians often make is relying too much on the written word. Standup is an oral medium and you’ve got to talk out your bits to hear how they really sound. If you just go up there and recite things you’ve written, the audience will likely tune you out.
Over at the Rubesletter, my other newsletter (fyi it’s where I write essays and post videos/jokes), I wrote about typing vs. speaking (re: moral crusaders) and how much the way words sound matters.
Excerpt below:
Words that work
As a comedian, I’ve learned (the hard way) all about the difference between words that work when said aloud and those that don’t. Punchlines work better when they include quick words that feel like a verbal slap in the face instead of multisyllabic words/phrases that land like feathers. There’s a reason Seinfeld loves words like chimps, dirt, and sticks. They work. Also: If your punchline’s got a hard -k sound in it, all the better.
You see (well, hear) the same kind of thing in slang too. The briefer the word, the greater the impact. There’s a reason kids gravitate to terms like sus, mid, based, and fit. People want direct verbal paths. If you want people to get onboard with how you speak, make communication faster, not slower.
The ultimate proof is found in slurs that stick. Consider how the most infamous ones sound: Fag, chink, spic, kike, mick, wop, n****r, etc. It’s simple to say them. They’re short and punchy; they pack a punch. Hard -k sounds aplenty too. The lesson: If you want a term to spread far and wide, make it sound like something that’d pop onscreen during one of those old school Batman TV show brawls.
P.S. Here’s Neil Simon giving a similar p.o.v.: