Comedy as an abusive relationship
In show business, you are supposed to constantly project success. But what about the realities of heat, failure, etc.?
Some people “make it.” But many more struggle on. It’s not often they come clean in public about that struggle, though.
So it was refreshing to read
’s “Where Are You Now?” post where she writes, “Most people don’t feel their own heat even when they’re practically melting from it.”For more than twenty years, I have lived on the rush of risking it all to make it in Hollywood. Of throwing everything I had of myself into a whim. To seeing it - once in a while - pay off. So many of my dreams came true! It’s unbelievable! I got to breathe some very rare air and collect a lifetime of crazy stories along the way! But fundamentally, it has turned out to be a bit of an abusive relationship. The dehumanizing tricks of studios and networks, who string you along for years without pay. The false promises, the false starts, the imperceptible changes in the wind that leave you with nothing to show for your hard work and talent.
The whole piece is an interesting read and I admire her vulnerability in being open about all of it.
I left this comment on her post fyi:
FYI my assumption from afar was that you had heat, your posts were widely shared/appreciated, and your show about comedy was one to catch/ripe for the times. I hear you on this Hollywood stuff but it also feels easier than ever to make one's own way without relying on gatekeepers. Perhaps the message here is to find a path via YouTube, podcasts, Patreon, or some other 1,000 True Fans approach. Maybe one boat is getting smaller while another barge is pulling up to sail on with those who can pivot. (Writing this in part 'cuz I need to hear it myself.)
One thing I’ll add: Where you’re located is becoming less and less important in every industry. If LA/NYC ain’t your scene, it’s never been easier to get seen from afar.